TV on DVD: Breaking Bad finally breaks in Canada

Breaking Bad, the best series that you can’t see up here in Quebec because it’s on AMC, the U.S. channel behind Mad Men and which is available in other parts of Canada. I am somewhat mollified though, by the fact that we can see some nasty funny (content warning: “No Abu Ghraib-y hands!”) little webisodes on the U.S. AMC’s website. Season 2 of this series about a science teacher (Malcolm in the Middle’s Bryan Cranson won the 2008 Emmy for this role) with a terminal illness and a strong desire to break any laws necessary to provide for his family, starts in the U.S. on March 9. But we can finally savour Season 1 when it’s out on DVD this week (here’s the full episode, online, of the Season 1 pilot episode to whet your appetite).

That’s what I’ll be watch on this, my week of winter vacation. Try to get by without me. I’ll see you next week. In the meantime, here are some other TV on DVD titles, new on shelves this week.

Futurama: Into the Wild Green Yonder

Summer Heights High

Girlfriends: The Sixth Season

Dirty Jobs: Collection Four

Dangerous Assignment: The Complete Television Collection

Cities of the Underworld: Season 2

My Wife and Kids: Season 1

Three Sheets: Season 3

The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet: Vol. 9

– Denise Duguay

Midseason essentials, updated March 17

Hello again chickens! One more update, adding the April 9 start date for Amy Poehler’s Parks and Recreation and the April 5 and 6 return dates for In Treament Season 2.

Wednesday, March 18

Better Off Ted (8:30 p.m. ET on ABC). I am befuddled by this description, so I will not even try to paraphrase it for you from the original press release: “a satirical office comedy featuring a successful but morally conscious man, Ted, who runs a research and development department at a morally questionable corporation, Veridian Technologies. No achievement is too far fetched and no invention too unorthodox for Veridian. Need a suicidal turkey? Done. Need a metal that is hard as steel but bounces – and is edible? Done and done. Ted loves his seemingly perfect job; he loves his superhuman boss, Veronica, and colleagues Lem, Phil and Linda, but he’s starting to take a closer look at the company’s extremely questionable practices… especially when they try to cryogenically freeze one of Ted’s scientists for testing purposes. Starring Jay Harrington as Ted, Andrea Anders as Linda, Portia de Rossi as Veronica, Jonathan Slavin as Phil and Malcolm Barrett as Lem.”

Thursday, March19

Harper’s Island (online only until April 9) debuts online, described by CBS better than I could ever tart it up: “a 13-episode murder mystery about a group of family and friends who travel to a secluded island for a destination wedding. They’ve come to laugh… to love… and, though they don’t know it… to die.” Now you know. Sign up for the online-online side to this “multimedia event of the season”, via emails, here.

Tuesday, March 24

Saving Grace (Tuesdays at 10 p.m. ET on Showcase) returns for the final half of Season 2. (The new eps are on U.S. TNT starting Monday, March 9 so avert your eyes from talk shows, this website and online coverage if you hate surprises about plot and new guest stars.)

Thursday, March 26

In the Motherhood (8 p.m. ET on ABC) Megan Mullally (Will and Grace) and Cheryl Hines (Curb Your Enthusiasm) star in the mommy sitcom based on the web series that is based on real stories from mom’s “who have lost their kids in a mall… not for very long, but…”.

Tuesday, March 31

Cupid (10 p.m. ET on ABC) debuts, “a romantic dramedy about Trevor Pierce (Bobby Cannavale, Will & Grace), a larger than life character who may or may not be the Roman god of love, Cupid, sent to earth to bring 100 couples together before he is allowed to return to Mt. Olympus.” He is also under the care of a therapist, played by Sarah Paulson (Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip).

Sunday, March 29

No. 1 Ladies Detective Agency (8 p.m. ET on HBO Canada) is a new seven-episode series based on Alexander McCall Smith’s crime novels and directed by the late Anthony Minghella. Jill Scott plays the central character, the don’t-mess-with-her agency owner who goes by Precious Ramotswe.

Thursday, April 2

ER (start time tba, on NBC and CTV). The enduring medical drama will end a run that started in September 1994. Get the tissue. Noah Wyle returned Feb. 19 (three more episodes, we are told) and Julianna Margulies and George Clooney will also make brief return appearances for the finale. Note: the finale date has been changed several times, but this date reflects what is expected to be the last adding of episodes.

Friday, April 3

Spectacle: Elvis Costello with … (Fridays at 10 p.m. ET on CTV, repeating on Bravo Saturdays at 8 p.m. ET and Sundays at 6 p.m. ET). This new series, which has been airing on U.S. Sundance Channel since last December, finally comes to Canada: “In the critically-acclaimed, hour-long series, music legend Elvis Costello conjures up eclectic performances and candid conversations about the creative process, the power of music and the impact it has on creators and the world at large. The collaborators featured with Costello in the series reads as one of the best concert line ups ever. He is joined by musical heavyweights The Police (in their final TV performance and interview), Sir Elton John, Tony Bennett, Lou Reed, Kris Kristofferson, Herbie Hancock, Renée Fleming, Rosanne Cash, Smokey Robinson, John Mellencamp and James Taylor, among others.“

April 5 & 6 2009

In Treatment (two new back-to-back sessions on two consecutive days starting at 9 p.m. ET on HBO Canada) returns with new  episodes following a therapist and his sessions with a select group of patients

Monday, April 6

Surviving Suburbia (9:30 p.m. ET on ABC) Bob Saget (Full House, How I Met Your Mother) and Cynthia Stevenson (Dead Like Me, Men in Trees) have two kids, a 20-year-old marriage and plenty of cynicism. Like Southland, below, this series description is awfully familiar but here’s hoping the performances make it worth it.

Wednesday, April 8

The Unusuals (10 p.m. ET on ABC) debuts, a black-comic police drama starring Amber Tamblyn (Joan of Arcadia, the Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants) and Harold Perrineau (Lost).

Thursday, April 9

Southland (10 p.m. ET on NBC) Standing bravely in the void left by ER is this new L.A.-set cop series (which, like ER, comes from John Wells) starring Michael Cudlitz (A River Runs through It) as a vet, Ben Sherman (The O.C.) as the rookie, Regina King (Ray) as the chick cop with a heavy burden at home, Tom Everett Scott (Boiler Room) as her unhappily married partner… Of course it’s ridiculous to critique a show based on a list of cast and characters, but sheesh, I hope the performances rise above their unoriginal characters.

Parks and Recreation (8:30 p.m. ET Thursdays on NBC and Citytv) is ex-SNLer Amy Poehler’s new workplace sitcom, if by workplace you’re okay with dumpsite. Here’s the teaser from the Super Bowl, in which her character tries to film a public service ad about turning a town dump into a lovely park. For recreation.

Harper’s Island (10 p.m. ET on CBS) debuts, described by CBS better than I could ever tart it up: “a 13-episode murder mystery about a group of family and friends who travel to a secluded island for a destination wedding. They’ve come to laugh… to love… and, though they don’t know it… to die.” Now you know. The interactive multimedia aspect of the show started March 19. Sign up for emails here.

Sunday, April 19

Sit Down, Shut Up (8:30 p.m. ET on Fox) With producers’ credits coming from Arrested Development and Two and a Half Men, it’s hard to know which way this’ll go, but I’m up for giving it a chance: “an animated comedy that focuses on the lives of staff members at a high school in a small Florida fishing town (Go Baiters!) who never lose sight of the fact that the children must ALWAYS come second.”

Rescue Me (10 p.m. on Showcase) returns for a fifth season (caution in clicking on the site here: S5 debuts April 7 in the U.S. on FX) in which Tommy (Denis Leary) deals with the death of his dad, a review that might affect his career as a firefighter and the arrival of a French documentarian working on a film to mark the 10th anniversary of 9/11. Whot? Franco has a conspiracy theory? Tommy is torn about whether to tear up as is Kleenex or tear up as in broken pool cues?

Monday, April 20

Who Do You Think You Are (8 p.m. ET on NBC) is a series in which celebrities trace their family roots. Names attached so far (but not clear if they’re subjects or hosts) include Lisa Kudrow, Sarah Jessica Parker and Susan Sarandon.

Spring 2009

MADtv (Saturdays at 10 p.m. ET on Fox) ends its 14-year run on the network, with the variety comedy show’s final date tba.
Still waiting for word on Rescue Me’s return on Showcase and some other stuff. Stay tuned.

Spring, date tba

The Goode Family (ABC) “A new animated series from Mike Judge, creator of “King of the Hill.” “The Goode Family” is obsessed with doing the “right” thing whether it’s environmentally, politically or socially. Unfortunately their efforts often have unintended comic consequences.”

The Cleveland Show (Fox) Not expected before fall despite hopes to the contrary, this is a spinoff of the Family Guy.

– Denise Duguay

Talk-show tango: Feb. 23-27

Big week for Jimmy Fallon. After months of preparation, including his daily video podcast, an astounding array of promos that you won’t be able to avoid during NBC prime time, a recent guest appearances on the Tonight Show (repeating Friday) and on Late Night with Conan O’Brien (which you can watch below), Fallon is now counting the hours until he launches his own Late Night show next Monday, March 2. While he’s counting down, he’ll also get up early on Friday, Feb. 27 to guest on NBC’s Today show at 9 a.m. And then… Here’s Fallon’s first week guest list and then on to our usual week of talk-show guest lists, (a highlight of which is: if you missed Joaquin Phoenix’s flameout on Letterman not too long ago, you can see it or see it again — definitely worth it in a schadenfreude kinda way — Thursday night on Letterman).

Preview — Late Night with Jimmy Fallon’s debut-week guest list (so far) includes: Robert De Niro and Van Morrison on Monday March 2; Tina Fey, Jon Bon Jovi and Santogold on Tuesday March 3; Cameron Diaz, Billy Crudup on Wednesday March 4, Donald Trump, Serena Williams and Ludacris on Thursday March 5; and Drew Barrymore and Mario Batali on Friday March 6.

LATE NIGHT Feb. 23-27

Late Show with David Letterman (11:35 p.m. ET on CBS and E!)

Monday: Kate Winslet (Revolutionary Road), Marv Albert (R)

Tuesday:  Super Bowl champ Ben Roethlisberger, Steve Martin (Pink Panther) (R)

Wednesday: Rene Zellweger (New in Town), Tony Dungy (Uncommon: Finding Your Path to Significance), Graham Nash sitting in with the band (R)

Thursday: Joaquin Phoenix (Two Lovers), SI Swimsuit cover model Bar Rafaeli, Anthony Hamilton (The Point of It All) (R)

Friday: Clint Eastwood (Gran Torino), Randy Rogers Band (Randy Rogers Band) (R)

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:35 a.m. ET on CBS and E!)

Monday: Trace Adkins, blogger Perez Hilton (R)

Tuesday: Michael Clarke Duncan, Richard Zoglin, Adele (R)

Wednesday: Wanda Sykes (The New Adventures of Old Christine), Glasvegas (R)

Thursday: Tom Selleck, Glen Campbell (R)

Friday: Rosie O’Donnell, The Knux (R)

Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35 p.m. ET on NBC)

Monday: Mickey Rourke (The Wrestler), Toni Collette (The United States of Tara), John Legend (R)

Tuesday: Drew Barrymore (He’s Just Not That Into You), Serena Williams, will.i.am (R)

Wednesday: Jennifer Aniston (He’s Just Not That Into You), Super Bowl MVP Santonio Holmes (R)

Thursday: Marisa Tomei (The Wrestler), animal handler Grey Stafford, comic Ty Barnett (R)

Friday: Jimmy Fallon (Late Night with Jimmy Fallon), astrophysicist Neil DeGrasse Tyson, Lee Ann Womack (R)

Late Night with Conan O’Brien (12:35 a.m. ET on NBC)

Monday: Josh Brolin, Shaun Ellis and Helen Jeffs, Nikka Costa (R)

Tuesday: Tina Fey, Peter Sarsgaard (R)

Wednesday: Seth Green, Artie Lange, Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band (R)

Thursday: Paul Rudd, John Stamos, Boz Scaggs (R)

Friday:  Hugh Laurie, Joel McHale, The Gaslight Anthem (R)

Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05 a.m. ET on ABC)

Monday: The Jonas Brothers, Darius Rucker

Tuesday: comic Don Rickles, Ben Sollee

Wednesday: Rob Lowe (Brothers and Sisters), Khloe Kardashian (Keeping Up with the Kardashians), The Living Things

Thursday: Calista Flockhart (Brothers and Sisters), John Michael Higgins (Fired Up!), comic Nick DiPaolo

Friday: Jimmy Kimmel Live’s After the Academy Awards, with Mel Gibson and Robin Thicke (repeated from Sunday)

Daily Show with Jon Stewart (midnight ET, CTV)

Monday: Jeff Bezos (Amazon CEO)

Tuesday: Ricky Gervais

Wednesday: Tom Selleck (Jesse Stone: Thin Ice)

Thursday: news anchor Brian Williams

The Colbert Report (12:30 a.m. ET, CTV)

Monday: Helen Fisher

Tuesday: Cliff Sloan

Wednesday: Mayor John Fetterman

Thursday: Kris Kristofferson

The Hour (11 p.m. ET, CBC)

Monday: Chris Cornell

Tuesday: Gordon Pinsent, Michael Muhammad Knight

Wednesday: Joe Clark, Eugene Levy

Thursday: Scott Taylor, Colin Mochrie

Friday: tba

Charlie Rose (11:30 p.m. ET, PBS)

Mr. Rose announces his guests only on the day of broadcast, so please click on the show-name link above for the most recent guest announcement.

Real Time with Bill Maher (11 p.m. ET, Fridays only, on HBO Canada)

Friday: new episode but guest list tba

DAYTIME

Live with Regis and Kelly (9 a.m. ET, NBC and CTV)

Monday: tba

Tuesday:

Wednesday:

Thursday:

Friday:

The View 11 a.m. ET, ABC and CTV)

Monday:  Jane Fonda (33 Variations), money tips

Tuesday: Tom Jones

Wednesday: Jeff Foxworthy, LaBelle

Thursday: Mutt Dog Show

Friday: Rob Lowe (Brothers and Sisters), Jason Mesnick (The Bachelor), Joy’s Month in ReVIEW

The Bonnie Hunt Show (2 p.m. ET on Citytv and NBC)

Monday: tba

Tuesday:

Wednesday:

Thursday:

Friday:

The Ellen DeGeneres Show (4 p.m. ET, CBC)

Monday: tba

Tuesday:

Wednesday:

Thursday:

Friday:

Oprah 4 p.m. (NBC and CTV)

Monday: After-Oscar party with Hugh Jackman

Tuesday: Octuplet Controversy: Dr. Oz Weighs In

Wednesday: 10 Cities in America: Lisa Ling Special Report on the Economy

Thursday: Oprah on Location at the Walter Reed Army Medical Centre

Friday: Oprah Fridays Live

– Denise Duguay

Conan O’Brien’s Heart of Darkness

“I’ve spent my fair share of time at 3 in the morning,” he said, “lying awake like Martin Sheen in the movie [Apocalypse Now], staring at the ceiling fan, thinking about my trip up river — and we all know how that turned out.”

That, Conan O’Brien tells the NYT’s Bill Carter, is a little snapshot of what it’s like to be on the verge of assuming control of the late-night institution, the Tonight Show on June 1.

After O’Brien wraps his last NYC-based Late Night show Friday (Feb. 20) at 12:35 a.m. ET on NBC, O’Brien’ll have a few nights of lying awake, recreating scenes — sans Sheen’s actual heart attack, of course — from the epic Coppola film inspired by the great Joseph Conrad novel.

While you’re waiting for O’Brien’s East Coast finale or his West Coast debut, read Carter’s piece, Building a home in late night’s shifting sand. He’s brilliant and so it the story, in which he weaves his ample knowledge of the late-night scene.

– Denise Duguay

TV Dinner Time: Oscar edition

The first Oscar bash I remember was the one I missed. My mother, who denied me even Carole Burnett and Clem Kadiddlehopper because they were too late (yet allowed Outer Limits because it was earlier and what did she know from sci-fi), allowed my brother and I the rare privilege of staying up late to watch the swish Academy Awards with her. My mother looked a little like Elizabeth Taylor. The movies were and are her thing. Watching with her – the smell of burnt Jiffy Pop and melted butter heavy in the air – was more glamourous than even the real thing: I tagged along with the photographer boyfriend when he covered the event a couple of Oscars ago and though I strode the red carpet (the day before, but still) and was only feet from Helen Mirren on the day of, the real thing seemed shockingly … mortal.

But back to that first remembered Oscar bash. So it was mid ‘60s and my younger brother and I took to our beds for the pre-awards nap and… Morning came with the bitter realization that the then-hated brother had failed to wake me. Bitter. I’m better now, after years of red-carpet therapy, but Iever since, I really like to tart it up on Oscar night. And no naps.

This year, I am thrilled to share a true gift of a dip recipe. After years of pestering, and never once having failed to wake her for the Oscars, Gaylene has finally consented to share her mom’s hot crab dip. You’ll find the recipe below. She advises a solid cracker. I suggest skipping the cracker and just going in with a spoon, but that’s me.

If you desire two or three more courses for your Oscar feast, there are two high-falutin ways to go.

You can do you best to pretend that you have scored an invite to the bash of post-awards-show bashes, the Governors Ball, at which Wolfgang Puck will, for the 15th consecutive year, feed the starving red-carpet waifs. According to Oscars.org:

“The menu created by Puck and chefs Lee Hefter and Matt Bencivenga will feature several Ball favorites, including Tuna Tartare in Sesame Miso Cones; Chopped Chino Farms Vegetable Salad with Ginger Soy Vinaigrette, Maine Lobster and Caviar; and Pastry Chef Sherry Yard’s gold-dusted chocolate Oscars®.”

(Richard Harbaugh / ©A.M.P.A.S.)

Or you could pick one (or more!) menus crafted by epicurious.com and inspired by the best-film nominees, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Frost/Nixon, Milk, Slumdog Millionaire and The Reader.

Now, other preparations: What’s an Oscar soiree without a ballot to vote on? Oscars.org has a lovely ballot that you can download here (it’s a pdf). And who to vote for? Well, you could check out the Gazette’s fab Oscar package, including an audio podcast of predictions, featuring yours truly with Gazette columnists Bill Brownstein and John Griffin, as well as a fashion look-back with Fashion Editor Eva Friede.

But back to the main event. So without further ado, here is devoted foodie and good friend Gaylene’s generously shared recipe.

Gaylene’s Mom’s Cherished and Beloved Crab Dip

1 onion chopped
2 strips bacon chopped
1 tomato chopped
1/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
1/4 tsp paprika
8 oz cream cheese (softened)
1 tbsp milk
1 can crab meat

Brown onion and bacon. Add tomato, salt, pepper, paprika. Beat cheese with milk. Add crab to bacon mix. Put together in casserole dish. Bake at 375 degrees until it browns and bubbles.

– Denise Duguay

TV on DVD: This Dead be not proud

I was so looking forward to the DVD movie Dead Like Me: Life After Death that my expectations were cranked way too high. I loved the series on which this movie is based, a two-season affair that aired in Canada on Showcase and which was very clever, touching and blackly funny. The series begins with an introduction to George (Ellen Muth), a grumpy young woman still living at home and with no inclination to take the next step in her life. And then … well, I will let you discover how she comes to join the Seattle-area reapers. You see, when some of us die, we move on. Others, they become reapers, living a kind of purgatory in which the penance is collecting the souls of the soon-to-depart. Failure to collect the soul is not at all good for either the intended dead or the reaper. The boss, or a sub boss because the big boss does not get a credit here, is played by Mandy Patinkin and is called Rube. He is a tough boss, but soft on the inside. Into this mix, toss fellow reapers who are in various states of peace with their temporary assignments. Daisy (Laura Harris) can be a viper, but batts her eyelashes and the effect is very cute. Slacker Mason (Callum Blue) escapes whatever responsibility he can, but in the end… well in the end they’re all decent. Roxy Harvey (Jasmine Guy) is all law and order, down to her police uniform. You see despite having daily soul-claiming assignments, these reapers also have to make a living, so to speak. George passes her days in a cubical farm, under the flamboyantly crazy direction of cat-lover Delores (Christine Willes).

The third leg of this very sturdy footstool of a series George’s relationship with her family; reapers appear as they did in life to everyone except those who knew them, so George encounters her family more often than Rube would like, but they see a stranger. What George sees is a family sagging with grief at her absence: her mother, played by Cynthia Stevenson, is still fuming at herself and George for the argument they had before … well, you’ll see. It could all be stupid and ham-fisted. Instead, it is a darkly modern It’s a Wonderful Life, with no waking up at the end. It’s a blend of absurdist workplace comedy, family drama and existential comedy.

And then there’s the movie. The first sign of trouble was with the promos at the beginning of the preview DVD, featuring two teen-targetted movies whose names I instantly forgot. Teens? While Dead Like Me was about an older teenage girl it was not the kind of thing I’d think would attract kids. After wading into the movie, I am very disappointed to see that the movie essentially treats the excellent series as a sketch for a lame-ass movie seemingly aimed not at teens but at stupid teens, or teens who are playing a video game while watching. Henry Ian Cusick (oh Desmond, go back to Lost and get on that boat and just sail away) is the new reaper boss and he is all efficiency. George breaks some major rules. I… well I got about three-quarters through and then bailed out. Crushed. I had hoped there would be life after the death of Dead Like Me, cut down so young after only two seasons. But no.

Do me a favour? Rent the series, which is also out this week on DVD in a whole-series set. It’s a great piece of work. Even my then 64-year-old mother was hooked on it when she visited a couple of years ago. But do not rent this standalone movie, released on its own.

On a happier note, here are some other TV releases new on DVD this week:
Murder She Wrote: The Complete Ninth Season
High School Musical 3: Senior Year
Wycliffe: Series 1
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: The Eighth Year
Sabrina the Teenage Witch: The Fifth Season
The Beverly Hillbillies: The Official Third Season
The F Word: Series 1
The Real Adventures of Jonny Quest: The Complete First Season (1996)
Inspector Gadget’s Last Case
Classic Fairy Tales Vol. 1 and 2
– Denise Duguay

Talk-show tango: Feb. 16-20

Countdown to Conan O’Brien’s exit from Late Night — his last show is Friday — ending a 16-year stint that began when he replaced David Letterman, when he moved to the Late Show. The backroom shenanigans involved in that shuffle were thoroughly covered by the New York Times’ Bill Carter in his book The Late Shift. Will this late-night game of Bingo! warrant the same kind of speculation? The Associated Press had a quick chat with O’Brien, who says he’s in denial but is putting on a brave face about the radical change to come, his desire to stay true to his silly and sometimes radical comedy.

LATE NIGHT

Late Show with David Letterman (11:35 p.m. ET on CBS and E!)

Monday: Ellen Pompeo (Grey’s Anatomy), Daytony 500 winner Matt Kenseth, Willie Nelson and Asleep at the Wheel (Willie and the Wheel)

Tuesday: Bonnie Hunt (The Bonnie Hunt Show), M.Ward (Hold Time)

Wednesday: Donald Trump (the Apprentice), Antony and the Johnsons (The Crying Light)

Thursday: David Spade (Rules of Engagement), Davis Sanborn with Sam Moore (Here & Gone)

Friday: Barbara Walters (Barbara Walters Oscar Special, Mike Birbiglia (Never Going Back)

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:35 a.m. ET on CBS and E!)

Monday: David Boreanaz, Philip Johnson, Zac Brown Band

Tuesday: Bill Maher, Chris Klein

Wednesday: Wynonna, Peter Bart

Thursday: Paula Abdul (American Idol), NASCAR driver Carl Edwards

Friday: Rosie O’Donnell, The Knux

Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35 p.m. ET on NBC)

Monday: Kevin Bacon (Taking Chance), Josh Tickell, Lily Allen

Tuesday: Jennifer Love Hewitt (Ghost Whisperer), extreme athlete Travis Astrana, Andrew Bird

Wednesday: Charlie Sheen (Two and a Half Men), Arianna Huffington, Lisa Hannigan

Thursday: Dennis Miller, Freida Pinto (Slumdog Millionaire), A.R. Rahman

Friday: Meredith Vieira (Today), Tom Papa, Chris Isaak

Late Night with Conan O’Brien (12:35 a.m. ET on NBC)

Monday: Bob Saget, thenewno2

Tuesday: Jason Sudeikis

Wednesday: Nathan Lane

Thursday: Jerry Seinfeld, Craig Bierko

Friday: The White Stripes 

Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05 a.m. ET on ABC)

Monday: Anne Hathaway (Bride Wars), Jensen Ackles (My Bloody Valentine 3-D), Lenka

Tuesday: Tyler Perry (Madea Goes to Jail), Blues Traveler

Wednesday: Naomi Watts, Whitney Port (The City), K’Naan

Thursday: Rosie Perez, Danny McBride (Eastbound and Down), Anna Marina

Friday: Dev Patel (Slumdog Millionaire), Robin Roberts (Good Morning America), Kinky

Daily Show with Jon Stewart (midnight ET, CTV)

Monday: tba

Tuesday:

Wednesday:

Thursday:

The Colbert Report (12:30 a.m. ET, CTV)

Monday: tba

Tuesday:

Wednesday:

Thursday:

The Hour (11 p.m. ET, CBC)

Monday: Pat Quinn

Tuesday: Lily Allen

Wednesday: tba

Thursday: Rick Mercer

Friday: tba

Charlie Rose (11:30 p.m. ET, PBS)

Mr. Rose announces his guests only on the day of broadcast, so please click on the show-name link above for the most recent guest announcement.

Real Time with Bill Maher (11 p.m. ET, Fridays only, on HBO Canada)

Friday: new episode this week! Guests include Tina Brown. More details promised.

DAYTIME

Live with Regis and Kelly (9 a.m. ET, NBC and CTV)

Monday: Jonas Brothers, Freida (Slumdog Millionaire)

Tuesday: Joy Philbin co-hosts, Molly Sims

Wednesday: Becki Newton (Ugly Betty), Barbara Walters (Barbara Walters’ Oscar Special), Neal McDonough

Thursday: Kevin Bacon (Taking Chance), New Kids on the block

Friday: Selma Blair (Kath & Kim)

The View 11 a.m. ET, ABC and CTV)

Monday:Patricia Arquette (Medium) Emily Osment

Tuesday: Hot Topics, Broadway’s Shrek

Wednesday: Bonnie Hunt (The Bonnie Hunt Show), Ben Lyons and Ben Mankiewicz (At the Movies)

Thursday: Laurence Fishburne (CSI), Bank on the View

Friday: Tyhler Perry and Keshbia Knight Pulliam (Madea Goes to Jail), best of the toy fair for under $20

The Bonnie Hunt Show (2 p.m. ET on Citytv and NBC)

Monday: Simon Baker (The Mentalist), Joanna Garcia (Privileged)

Tuesday: Tony Shalhoub (Monk)

Wednesday: Jane Kaczmarek, Jensen Ackles

Thursday: Brendan Fraser

Friday: Denis Leary, Aisha Tyler

The Ellen DeGeneres Show (4 p.m. ET, CBC)

Monday: Simon Baker (The Mentalist), Miranda Cosgrove

Tuesday: Jonas Brothers

Wednesday: Naomi Watts, Lily Allen

Thursday: Nick Carter, Jeff Probst

Friday: Ellen’s Oscar show

Oprah 4 p.m. (NBC and CTV)

Monday: World’s Smartest and Most Talented Kids (R)

Tuesday: Family addicted to heroin (R)

Wednesday: How to Affair-Proof Your Marriage: Why Men Cheat (R)

Thursday: Clean Up Your Messy House (R)

Friday: Oprah Live: Oscars Countdown

– Denise Duguay

Sucks to be Conan

So first the poor schlub Late Night host actually believes NBC when it says it is crowning him the new Tonight Show host. Then NBC is revealed to be only technically good for its word. Because while O’Brien will indeed take over as Tonight Show host on June 1, he will once again be following Jay Leno, to whom NBC made a gift of the prime-time weeknight hour of 10 p.m.

And then he invited former SNL comic Norm Macdonald onto the show Tuesday night. And got handed his pride. The video seems to be a little tough to find — unless you’re clever enough to have one of those Canadian IP workarounds. But the good people at tvsquad.com have the important details.

Anyone else who saw the interview or has a Canada-friendly link, please share.

Conan O’Brien hosts his last Late Show next Friday, on Feb. 20, at 12:35 a.m. Jimmy Fallon, who’s been hosting a webcast in preparation for taking over Late Night on March 2, guests tonight (Wednesday, Feb. 11) on Late Show.

– Denise Duguay

Talk-show tango: Feb. 9-13

Soooooooo. Since Bill Maher has made his living by wanking about the former wanker in the White House, what’s he to do now that there’s a new guy in the Oval Office? Perhaps he’ll give a tease Tuesday when he visits Jay Leno to promote the Feb. 20 return of his Real Time rant on HBO Canada.

LATE NIGHT

Late Show with David Letterman (11:35 p.m. ET on CBS and E!)

Monday: Naomi Watts (The International), Danny McBride (Eastbound and Down), The Von Bondies (Love, Hate and Then There’s You)

Tuesday: The crew of US Airways 1549, Heartless Bastards (The Mountain)

Wednesday: Joaquin Phoenix (Two Lovers), Sports Illustrated swimsuit model, Anthony Hamilton (The Point of It All)

Thursday: The Jonas Brothers (Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience), Chris Russo, Ashford and Simpson (Sitting-In)

Friday: Martha Stewart (The Martha Stewart Show), Janke Johannsen, Matt Nathanson (Some Mad Hope)

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:35 a.m. ET on CBS and E!)

Monday: Michael Clarke Duncan, Richard Zoglin, Adele

Tuesday: Sean Combs, Olivia Williams

Wednesday: comic Steve Coogan, Connie Britton

Thursday: comic Lewis Black, Shirley Manson

Friday: Tom Selleck, Glen Campbell

Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35 p.m. ET on NBC)

Monday: Simon Baker (The Mentalist), Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt (The Hills), Duffy

Tuesday: Bill Maher (Real Time with Bill Maher), Viola Davis (Doubt), Raphael Saadiq

Wednesday: Amy Adams (Doubt), Paula Abdul (American Idol), Dierks Bentley

Thursday: Bill Cosby, Alec Greve, Erin McCarley

Friday: Anne Hathaway (Rachel Getting Married), Arizona Cards’ Kurt Warner, Annie Lennox

Late Night with Conan O’Brien (12:35 a.m. ET on NBC)

Monday: Clive Owen (The International), Judah Friendlander (30 Rock), Brett Bennen

Tuesday: Norm MacDonald, Gordon Ramsay (Hell’s Kitchen), Levon Helm

Wednesday: Jimmy Fallon

Thursday: Adam Baldwin (30 Rock), Eliza Dushku (Dollhouse),

Friday: Isla Fisher (Confessions of a Shopaholic), Jonas Brothers, Dan Auerbach

Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05 a.m. ET on ABC)

Monday: Mickey Rourke (The Wrestler), sportscaster Michael Strahan, comic Morgan Murphy

Tuesday: Josh Brolin (Milk), Dancing with the Stars Season 8 contestant, The Little Ones

Wednesday: Grant Show (Grey’s Anatomy and Private Practice), Any Dick (Sober House), The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

Thursday: Demetri Martin (Important Things with Demetri Martin), Marisa Tomei (The Wrestler), Mishka, Matthew McConaughey

Friday: Johnny Knoxville (Nitro Circus and Jackassworld), Tricia Helfer (Battlestar Galactica), musical guest Mark Seliger and Rusty Truck

Daily Show with Jon Stewart (midnight ET, CTV)

Monday: Walter Isaacson (How to Save Your Newspaper)

Tuesday: Thomas Ricks (The Gamble)

Wednesday: Daniel Sperling (Two Billion Cars)

Thursday: John Sununu, former U.S. senator for New Hampshire

The Colbert Report (12:30 a.m. ET, CTV)

Monday: TV on the Radio (Dear Science)

Tuesday: Robert Ballard (Titanic)

Wednesday: Steven Pinker (My Genomic Self)

Thursday: Adam Gopnik (Angels and Ages)

The Hour (11 p.m. ET, CBC)

Monday: Gordon Ramsay, John Howard

Tuesday: Mike Holmes

Wednesday: Ron MacLean, Chris Noth

Thursday: tba

Friday: tba

Charlie Rose (11:30 p.m. ET, PBS)

Mr. Rose announces his guests only on the day of broadcast, so please click on the show-name link above for the most recent guest announcement.

Real Time with Bill Maher (11 p.m. ET, Fridays only, on HBO Canada)

Friday: repeat this Friday and returning with the new season Feb. 20.

DAYTIME

Live with Regis and Kelly (9 a.m. ET, NBC and CTV)

Monday:  NBA all-star Tony Parker

Tuesday: Isla Fisher (Confessions of a Shopoholic), Gordon Ramsay (Hell’s Kitchen)

Wednesday: Naomi Watts (The International), Annie Lennox

Thursday: Eliza Dushku (Dollhouse)

Friday: Anne Hathaway (Rachel Getting Married), Kevin James (Paul Blart: Mall Cop), David Cook, Don Rickles

The View 11 a.m. ET, ABC and CTV)

Monday: Hot Topics, Mario Cantone (Sex and the City)

Tuesday: Joan Rivers, Daniel Dae Kim (Lost)

Wednesday: Kate Winslet (The Reader and Revolutionary Road), Joan Krakowski (30 Rock)

Thursday: Love-theme show with Miss Piggy, Patti Stanger (Millionaire Matchmaker), Helen Fisher (Why Him Why Her)

Friday: Clive Owen (The International), Melissa Leo (Frozen River)

The Bonnie Hunt Show (2 p.m. ET on Citytv and NBC)

Monday: Peter Reckel and Kristian Alfonso (Days of Our Lives), Yvonne Strahovski (Chuck)

Tuesday: Hillary Duff

Wednesday: Rob Morrow (Numb3rs)

Thursday: Chandra Wilson (Grey’s Anatomy)

Friday: Joan Rivers, Phil Keoghan (Amazing Race)

The Ellen DeGeneres Show (4 p.m. ET, CBC)

Monday: John Mayer, Josh Groban, Chester Pitts, Ephraim Salaam, Lady Antebellum

Tuesday: Amy Brenneman (Private Practice), Lisa Wong, Jason Mraz, colbie Caillat

Wednesday: Eric Dane (Grey’s Anatomy), Robin Tunney (the Mentalist), Mel B, Melinda Doolittle

Thursday: Cardinals’ Kurt Warner, Steve Harvey, Neil Shaw

Friday: Jon Legend, Naila and Lee Simpson

Oprah 4 p.m. (NBC and CTV)

Monday: Princess Fannie Moves Back Home (R)

Tuesday: Dr. Oz and the Woman with the 140-Pound Tumour (R)

Wednesday: Why Men Cheat (R)

Thursday: Gwyneth Paltrow and Mario Batali (R)

Friday: I Love You Surprises (R)

– Denise Duguay

Lost Untangled is Lost unraveling

I’m not saying I know what the freak is going on in Lost, although I do love the story structure of the time-space travelling. It not only economically covers a lot of ground but has incredible suspense. Will it be the next time that we meet … Jacob? What will be the ramifications of Jin interacting with a young pregnant Danielle, piled on top of Daniel having urged Desmond to find his mother a couple of weeks back? And how heartbreaking was it to see Sawyer watch Kate help Claire deliver her baby, Aaron?

I love all this, although I love it in an “I’m not sure I understand it all means but but I’m glad we met and thank goodness we didn’t have children” kind of way. What? Oh wait. What I meant to write was that a storyteller’s job is to keep you spellbound and that Lost is doing. Logic is for later. Or never. Or for the weekend after I’ve had a couple of espressi (Look how Italian I can be!).

But neither logic nor understanding will be found by watching Lost Untangled. At first, I wondered what the jiggling action figures were up to as I fast-forwarded through ads in Life on Mars. Then I watched the full vid online. Action figures? This is Lost for idiots and idiots are so not on Lost’s horizon. ABC, just settle down and stop being so greedy for ratings.

But then here’s James Hibberd of The Live Feed saying he’s charmed by it all. So what do I know? What do you think?

– Denise Duguay

TV on DVD

Let’s see. Computer ate my homework. I had a bad day at the office. My mother was giving me grief. Naw. I don’t have the heart to lie. I’m a day late and a blog post short. It’s been a busy week and I spent the weekend getting caught up on Battlestar Galactica. Holy Butch Cassidy and Sundance Kid episode cliffhanger! Will Admiral Adama and Col. Tigh survive the firefight against the Gaeta-led Galactica rebels or go out in a hail of bullets, freeze-framed for all of intergalactic history? What’s that? You saw the promo for Blood on the Scales, the next episode (Friday at 10 p.m., repeating Sunday at 6 p.m. on Space, the Imagination Station, the cable channel with the best name ever) shows a very much alive Adama being hauled somewhere by somebody? Oh.
At any rate, all I have for TV on DVD is this crummy list. I promise. Next week I’ll put my nose to the grindstone and at least find someone else’s clever writing on TV on DVD releases. I knew you’d understand.
Here are some TV-on-DVD releases new on shelves this week. As always, thanks to Amazon.ca and TVshowsonDVD.com

Columbo: Mystery Movie Collection 1990
Bewitched: Season 7
Mystery Science Theatre 3000 Collection, Vol. 14
Trailer Park Boys: Season 7
The Partridge Family: Season 4
Becker: Season 2
60 Minutes Presents: Barack Obama’s Road to the White House
Due South: The Final Season
Rent a Goalie: The Complete First Season
Da Vinci’s Inquest: Season 2
Dark Angel: Season 1
Dave’s World: The Second Season
CSI: Grissom and Willows
Escape to Chimp Eden: Season 1
CSI Miami: Caine and Duquesne
Jon and Katae Plus Ei8ht: Season 3
– Denise Duguay

Talk-show tango: Feb. 2-6

“But I don’t do ads,” Conan O’Brien says at the beginning of this, well, ad. But this is Bud Light. Which means that not only is he soon under the influence — of the brand, not the beer, at least for the moment — but he deeply regrets it the next morning.
Enjoy O’Brien’s ad, one of this year’s fabled Super Bowl ads. And if you missed the whole lot on Sunday, Just for Laughs has them online.
And then on with the usual roundup of talk-show guest lists.

LATE NIGHT

Late Show with David Letterman (11:35 p.m. ET on CBS and E!)

Monday: Steve Martin (The Pink Panther 2 and The Crow: New Songs for the Five-String Banjo)

Tuesday: Richard Jenkins (The Visitor)

Wednesday: Joe Torre (The Yankee Years), Demetri Martin (Important Things with Demetri Martin), Lyle Lovett and John Hiatt (It’s Not Big It’s Large and Same Old Man)

Thursday: Extreme Fisherman, Matt Watson, Mark Olson and Gary Louris (Ready for the Flood)

Friday: Dakota Fanning (Push), comic Keith Alberstadt, Beirut (The Flying Club Cup)

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson (12:35 a.m. ET on CBS and E!)

Monday: Alfred Molina (The Pink Panther 2), magician Lance Burton

Tuesday: comic Robin Williams, magician Jason Randal

Wednesday: Samuel L. Jackson (Afro Samurai), magician Jason Hudy

Thursday: magician Ed Alonzo

Friday: Kristen Bell (Fanboys), Alex Kapranos and Franz Ferdinand (Tonight: Franz Ferdinand)

Tonight Show with Jay Leno (11:35 p.m. ET on NBC)

Monday: Kate Winslet (The Reader), Danny Boyle (Slumdog Millionaire), Akon

Tuesday: Penelope Cruz (Vicky Cristina Barcelona), K.L. Hughley (D.L. Hughey Breaks the News), Sara Bareilles

Wednesday: Drew Barrymore (He’s Just Not That Into You), Matthew Goode (Watchmen), will.i.am

Thursday: Jennifer Aniston (He’s Just Not That Into You), Jamey Johnson

Friday: Fred Salmoni and Animals, Frank Langella (Frost/Nixon), Ben Lee

Late Night with Conan O’Brien (12:35 a.m. ET on NBC)

Monday: Kathy Griffin (My Life on the D List), Paula Dern, Amy Lavere

Tuesday: Brian Williams, Johnny Knoxville, Zac Brown Band

Wednesday: Jon Hamm (Mad Men), Ginnifer Goodwin (He’s Just Not That Into You), Theresa Andersson

Thursday: Seth Meyers, Taraji P. Henson

Friday: Russell Crowe, Alicia Keys, Death Cab for Cutie

Jimmy Kimmel Live (12:05 a.m. ET on ABC)

Monday: Dustin Hoffman (Last Chance Harvey), jet pack pilot Eric Scott, Crooked X

Tuesday: John Cleese (The Pink Panther 2), Chris Ayres (Death by Leisure: A Cautionaray Tale), The Bird and the Bee

Wednesday: Justsin Long (He’s Just Not That Into You), Camilla Belle (Push), comic Nick Kroll

Thursday: Vanessas Minnillo (True Beauty), Morrissey

Friday: Teri Hatcher (Desperate Housewives, Larry Wilmore (I’d Rather We Got Casinos and Other Black Thoughts), Jazmine Sullivan

Daily Show with Jon Stewart (midnight ET, CTV)

Monday:tba

Tuesday:

Wednesday:

Thursday:

The Colbert Report (12:30 a.m. ET, CTV)

Monday: Dan Zaccagnino (Indaba Music)

Tuesday: Henry Louis Gates Jr.

Wednesday: Jonah Lehrer (How We Decide)

Thursday: somebody tba from The Pink Panther 2 (or whoever was updating the show sched was very tired and wrote “actor” instead of the actual actor’s name)

The Hour (11 p.m. ET, CBC)

Monday: animal expert Dave Salmoni, mathematician Daniel Tammet

Tuesday: Garry Marshall, Paul Saltzman

Wednesday: Gary Bettman

Thursday:Jason Mewes, John Howard

Charlie Rose (11:30 p.m. ET, PBS)

Mr. Rose announces his guests only on the day of broadcast, so please click on the show-name link above for the most recent guest announcement.

Real Time with Bill Maher (11 p.m. ET, Fridays only, on HBO Canada)

Friday: repeating until Season 7 episodes start Feb. 20.

DAYTIME

Live with Regis and Kelly (9 a.m. ET, NBC and CTV)

Monday: Teri Hatcher (Desperate Housewives, Coraline), Mel. B

Tuesday: Steve Martin (The Pink Panther 2), Anil Kapoor (Slumdog Millionaire)

Wednesday: Katie Couric (All Access Grammy Special), Joe Torre

Thursday: Kierks Bentley

Friday: Mom’s Dream Come True contest

The View 11 a.m. ET, ABC and CTV)

Monday: Hot Topics

Tuesday: Paula Deen, Dev Patel (Slumdog Millionaire)

Wednesday: Jane Seymour, advice columnist Amy Dickinson, Richard Jenkins (The Visitor)

Thursday: Cuba Gooding Jr. (Gifted hands), Maksim Chmerkovskiy (Dancing with the Stars)

Friday: Molly Ringwald and Shailene Woodley (The Secret Llife of an American Teenager)

The Bonnie Hunt Show (2 p.m. ET on Citytv and NBC)

Monday: Greg Grunberg (Heroes), Danny Gans, Jack Witherspoon

Tuesday: Don Rickles, Niecy Nash, Solomon Leo

Wednesday: John Cleese (The Pink Panther 2), Jay McCarroll, Ask Alice

Thursday: Ricardo Antonio Chavira (Desperate Housewives), bear attack survivor Allena Hansen

Friday: Jo Frost (Supernanny), Kaley Cuoco (The Big Bang Theory), Rob Morrow (Numbers)

The Ellen DeGeneres Show (4 p.m. ET, CBC)

Monday: tba

Tuesday:

Wednesday:

Thursday:

Friday:

Oprah 4 p.m. (NBC and CTV)

Monday: Forgiving the Son who Killed a Family (R)

Tuesday: Thriftiest Family in America (R)

Wednesday: Jenny McCarthy’s Warrior Moms (R)

Thursday: Elizabeth Smart, John Ramsey: The Stories That Captured the Nation (R)

Friday: Beauty Secrets Around the World (R)

– Denise Duguay

Super Bowl ads on tap

I’m not always in love with Videotron, my Montreal cable provider. Why can’t we get Movie Network On Demand? Why can’t we get A Channel, CTV’s “B” channel. And how about AMC, the channel on which the rest of the country sees Mad Men etc?
But one day a year, I like Videotron. Super Bowl Sunday. Although CTV blocked the Super Bowl ads, my trusty HD flat screen showed that despite fears to the contrary, the U.S. ads were not blocked on NBC HD feed.
So thanks Videotron. But just for today.
If you were not so lucky and missed the ads — love the Jason Statham Audi car chase and the Doritos tomfoolery — you can watch em all online, courtesy of Just for Laughs, (or hulu.com if you’re in the U.S., lucky bastards!). Just for Laughs even has PETA’e Vegetarians Have Better Sex ad, rejected for broadcast for being too … vegetarian. Way better than a V8 if you ask me.

– Denise Duguay